I had my mock transfer yesterday and it has created a mix of emotions. In the last 4 years I have enjoyed my freedom from infertility (minus a melt down or two). For the first time in a long time we were living and enjoying our lives. In the last 10 days I have had 3 fertility appointments! It is exciting to know that the ball is rolling and Totsicle will come home with us soon but it also brings fear, jealousy, and apprehension.
For the first time in a long time I was in tears. I was so overwhelmed that I have almost convinced myself that if this doesn’t work then we are done. I may waiver on this later but I have decided that fertility testing is not for me. It is to time consuming and restricting.
Now that I am over 24hrs removed I am feeling better about everything and all this test has brought a new found appreciation of the many blessings in our lives. I hope in the next couple days to write an update about Ant. He is such an amazing little boy, we have been so blessed.
